Can You Really Change Yourself?
There are lots of theories out there about people’s ability to change themselves. Some think it’s entirely impossible, others think it can be possible in small increments, and others think it’s possible with hard work.
In this article, we’ll discuss whether or not you can really change yourself. We’ll also include some helpful tips to better yourself.
Can you change yourself?
The short answer to this question is yes, you can change yourself. It takes hard work, diligent effort, focus, dedication, and strength to change yourself, but it is possible. The thing is, it’s far from easy. Changing yourself takes a lot of diligent, focused effort. It isn’t something you can just try half-baked.
The road to changing yourself will be long and arduous. The main thing to keep in mind is to not give up and stay true to the path. Don’t be too hard on yourself if you slip from the course, just be sure you get back on the right path.
How do you change yourself?
Changing yourself, as we said, isn’t easy. If you decide to try to change yourself, you have to make the commitment and stick to it. You have to hold yourself accountable and make a diligent effort. You can’t give up halfway through and you can’t expect to make any headway if you’re half-assing it.
The following exercises and practices can help you implement change that sticks around in your life.
Develop new habits
The first way you can work to change yourself is by working to develop new habits. Make the changes you want to make your new habits. Practice them every day, multiple times a day. Before you know it, they’ll be second-nature to you.
If you want to change the fact that you’re lazy, make a habit of doing one positive bit of work a day. This could be something for your job or for cleaning your house; something productive and positive are the only requirements.
Practice identifying the bad behaviors or faults
The first step to fixing the bad behaviors or learning to deal with your faults is identifying what those are. Spend some time meditating each day, analyzing all of the experiences and interactions you’ve had. Try to find the problem areas and address them reasonably; don’t beat yourself up, that’s helping no one.
Be open to criticism
Part of how you change yourself is by listening to critiques from loved ones. You have to get these from people who truly love you that you trust want only the best for you. Take their criticisms and really think about and review them: could you stand to improve in that area? What might help you do that?
Each day, give yourself a positive new challenge to help you reach your goal of affecting your desired change. No one can make you change but you and you have to be responsible for motivating yourself, pushing and challenging yourself in order to get there.
Let’s say the behavior you’re trying to change is erring on the side of being a hermit. You could challenge yourself to go to a new public place each day or talk to a new person each day.
You can truly change yourself, but it won’t be easy. It takes diligent effort, dedication, and a lot of time and hard work to actually affect change in your life. Sometimes, it may even be emotionally painful and taxing, but you have to just push to see it through to the end. You have to be your own motivation, judge, and counselor. You have to hold yourself accountable, stick with it, and see it through to the end, come hell or high water.
Jill is also available for 1-to-1 online therapy if you'd prefer to speak to a very experienced therapist face to face.