Allow Yourself To Be Who You Want To Be
In a changing world, one which is evolving every second, the best thing you can ever be is yourself. We are so familiar with the notion since we have been hearing it our whole lives, however, the challenge presents itself when it comes to implementing. As much as one might want to be their real self, without acting upon it they will just continue going with the tides of everything else going on in the world. We get so caught up until we forget who we were in the first place and what we end up claiming to be is all but just a distorted version of the real person.
Being yourself sounds so easy, the idea of just working up and being who you have always been. When we look at it more closely it is not as easy it sounds, with so much influence all around us we can easily conform. Little by little we take the shape of the mold which we are in be it society, our friends, or family. There are myriads of voices speaking over our lives and many times we allow them to speak louder than our inner voices, to have more influence on us than that we have over ourselves.
Without the right understanding, the idea of just being yourself can be easily misused. I have seen people justify their toxic traits, anger bursts, and rudeness by claiming that is just who they are. Being yourself does not mean ignoring your bad habits, weaknesses, and toxic traits and just going with the flow. It does not entail giving excuses for the changes you are not willing to make by accepting them to be the real you.
To be your true self you have to define the kind of person you want to be, have a clear vision of who you want to be, and take intentional steps to be that person. Our true self is often covered up with conditioned, fear-based, and people-pleasing complexes that we end up believing to be our true nature. When you have established in your mind who you want to be, the next thing is to allow yourself to be just that. You are your greatest obstacle standing in the way of becoming who you are meant to be. The moment you decide to be who you want to be, you allow yourself to start taking intentional steps towards being that person.
You can only reach the point of being your true self, the one you have defined when you listen less to all other voices and pay more attention to your inner one. When you let go of how the world sees you, the labels and judgments you might have burdened yourself with and you start seeing yourself in a new light. It is only after letting go of the identity we are carrying can we then create another, one true to us.
Ways to allow yourself to be who you want to be:
* Mindfulness. Be more aware of your thoughts and the quality of your thinking. Never allow negative thoughts to run rampant in your mind setting boundaries on the person you can be, uproot them before they form a basis of who you see yourself to be. With a lot of negativity all around us, you cannot afford to be negative about yourself as well. Believe in yourself, your abilities and in the person, you want to be.
* Never aim to please people. The ones you want to please might not even be looking your way. Hold on to your beliefs and do what is right by them and not just what you find acceptable to those around you. To make others seem comfortable, we at times dim our light. Do not worry too much about how others see you, in good proportions, it can help you reflect and change for the better but when your every action becomes hinged on what people will think about you then you lose yourself.
* Fall in love with who you are. Learn to appreciate your efforts, appreciate yourself, and everything that makes you unique. Most times we are good friends to others but barely friends to ourselves. Be kind to yourself.
* Learn more about yourself. Dig deeper and find what makes you tick, what makes you happy, and pursue it. The more you know about yourself the easier it is to mold yourself into the person you want to be. Identifying your weakness, strengths, toxic traits and intentionally working on them to be a better you.
* Never let fear hold you back. Often, we become comfortable with versions of yourselves that are not true to who we are because we are afraid of change. We are afraid of what the change might come with, we conform and mimic all that is around us because we are afraid of not belonging. We are afraid of rejection. The fear of failure holds you back from being the person you can be, seeding doubt in you until you don’t believe in yourself. Let go of the fear and allow yourself to be who you want to be.
“allow yourself to transform as many times as you need to be fully happy and free’’